Posted in aspergers

Have you been diagnosed with Autism / Asperger’s as an adult?

Yesterday, I was diagnosed with Autism and Asperger’s by a specialist in the NHS after a 2.5 hour assessment. The formal report will follow, then I can understand better.

Is it okay to tell you? Because this is a really big thing for me. It affects absolutely everything in my life. No wonder I obsess, no wonder I am abrupt, no wonder people call me insensitive, no wonder, no wonder, no wonder…..

I think it’s going to take a while to sink in.

I’m 54 years old, why go for a diagnosis at my age?

When years of physical illness has no apparent reason other than a response to stress because I cannot speak my internal experience, when I’ve already been through a 9 year therapy mill to reach accountability as a psychotherapist and counsellor, yet I am still weird. When I have processed lots of past events and unfinished emotions, yet I am still an odd-bod. When it affects those around me to such an extent that it threatens relationships. When I get stuck in so many areas for no apparent reason…

It’s probably time to dig a little deeper. It’s probably a good idea to understand why writing is so therapeutic for me and being creative to such an extent that I disappear into it for days or weeks at a time and forget feed myself! It’s probably a good idea to understand why I could eat chicken sandwiches and cheesy crisps from the co-op supermarket every single day and be non-plussed about why my partner wants a different meal every day. Or why I go stir crazy if people call or visit (even if I am expecting them) and I am in the middle of something, my routine and structure, for goodness sake, it’s nothing personal! It is because I’m an alien from the planet zonk, whose idea of friendship is to wander off into a field and enjoy nature, alone!

Words escape me today, there seems to be an empty space before me.

Perhaps this is the space for the remainder of my life as an alien? But with Super Powers :):):)

Thanks for listening πŸ™‚ I needed that.

How did you feel after your diagnosis?

2 responses to “Have you been diagnosed with Autism / Asperger’s as an adult?”

  1. Deborah avatar

    I just began the process to pursue a diagnosis myself. The evaluator is so booked for so long, it will be months before I get in. And yet, the steps so far, with me at 43, have brought me such relief. So, too, has finding a couple fellow β€œalien” women. To find folks who think like me makes being alien feel more like community and much less lonely, which is the same feeling I had while reading your post. Thank you for sharing it. ❀️

    Like

    1. Busy Corner Books, Independent Book Publisher, incorporating faith-filled creative inspiration through 20+ years of psychotherapy experience. avatar

      You’re welcome, and thank you for your kind words. It’s lovely to meet you πŸ™‚
      Yes it is a long waiting time to be diagnosed, around 18 months on the NHS, I think. They brought mine forward because I had too many blue light emergency visits to hospital. I couldn’t translate a recent family trauma. The ambulance staff raised a red flag, hardly surprising really. I wasn’t aware of my behaviour! But I’ve a feeling it’s going to be life-changing, even at 54 years old.
      I can recognise what you are saying too. It does feel good yo connect with people who understand and ‘get it’. I hope you soon get your assessment and can plan a way forward. A friend told me it really is like discovering you have super powers πŸ™‚

      Like

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